8 Steps to Doubling Your Laundry

Step 1: Pick a three day weekend (Hint: a four day weekend, like the one we had, works even better) and neglect your housework and laundry for the duration.

Step 2: Have a panic attack the night before hubby returns to work and in your anxiety, do four loads of laundry. DO NOT fold said laundry. Instead, pile high on the bed and ignore while you do more interesting things (Hint: editing photos and playing a certain *MMORPG till your eyes bleed works well… cough, cough).

Step 3: Sweep the laundry off the bed and onto the floor at 1:00 AM (Hint: shake the bedspread and the laundry will land in a nicely piled heap), while kicking yourself for staying up so late. Promise yourself you’ll fold it all tomorrow.

Step 4: Catch a few more minutes of shut eye the next morning while hubby very generously straightens the house for you. (Note: you need not actually be asleep for this part, not that I’m admitting I ever feign sleep. Ahem.)

Step 5: Enjoy the day and completely forget about the enormous pile of laundry. (This is surprisingly easy to do when you have **2SC).

Step 6: Emerge from the shower that night and discover you have no clean underwear. Begin searching for the pile of unfolded, but clean, laundry. Begin to get suspicious when you can’t find it. Begin to recall your hubby cleaning house that morning… Think hard.

Step 7: Find clean laundry mixed with dirty laundry in the overflowing laundry room. Think about doing the ‘sniff test’ to every article to separate the clean from the dirty. Decide it’s not worth it.

Step 8: Spend your Wednesday doing 6 loads of laundry.

*Massively Multiplayer Online Role-Playing Game

**Two Small Children